ypsilanti's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- stopping standing still what was happening this time last year? was i stressed out even though i didn't know why? did i wake up with crumpled shoulders and strange headaches that stuck to my neck and spine? where was i sleeping? why was i sleeping? i came home from work for a couple hours because i totally felt like i was gonna pass out any minute. maybe i was freaked out because some ex-record store owner brought in four copies of the second Love album and two copies of "Forever Changes".. ha. enough to make anyone feel a little faint. band practice didn't work out afterwards, so i just messed around playing guitar and wondered why i'm always tired and crumbling. i walked over and saw your new house, then over to katie and mary and caroline's sleepy household, finding a little balerina musicbox on a table out in the street. it played so slow, and played forever, walking down the hill with this white box of chimes under my arms, feet shuffling and small bells sounding. i started walking home and thinking. i bought an oatmeal cream pie and missed brett for some reason. it was one of those 50 cent deals which is actually two pies crammed together in a double-decker fashion. the emergency records came in the mail yesterday, and they look and sound beautiful. i feel so pround and happy to have played some role in that band's existance, even if it's just having done the cover art for both of their records. more and more, things are stopping and standing still and asking you why over and over again until it's not even a question, just some weird jarring noise or statement or jumble. whywhywhywhywhwywhwywhwyhwywhwyhwywhwywhwywwhwywhwywhwyww wywhwywwhwywhwwywhwwywhwhwywhwywhwywhwywhwywhwywhwywhwywhwywywhwywhwwywhwywhwywywyyyyyyyywwwwwyywywywywywywywywywywywywywywywywywywyw ywywxxxxx. when we played with xBxRx the other day, they all took off their clothes, down to the underwear, and the singer said "We're encouraging you all to get into your underwear.. you know, you're born with one body, and it's the only one you ever get.. just one.. everyone's always talking about how their too fat, too skinny, too middle... fuck that. this is all you have." what an amazingly simple and dramaticly important thing to remember. everyone is beautiful. some stupid band's record is called "Stay what you are". also really amazingly simple and important to remember. a few years back, someone i only knew sort of well was leaving for school, and he was saying a semi-melodramatic goodbye, mostly for his own sake, but he looked at me and said "Stay the way you are." important to keep growing, understanding, learning. important to keep what is you. ******* listen to: ted leo/rx (best record of 2001. so fucking good.) zombies, xBxRx, unwound, convocation of, velvet underground, emergency, minny pops, king tubby, agustus pablo, congoes, wire, white stripes, fennesz, bob dylan. 1:56 a.m. - 9.7.01 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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